Friday, August 26, 2011

Sharing Space

Happy TGIF, friends!

I've already had such a busy morning. I hope yours has been just as busy. I find being busy tends to create a positive bubble around me, because when I'm busy, I'm focused and when I'm focused, I'm happy. You see, I have Adult Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder or ADHD. I've had it all my life, but it wasn't until I reached adulthood that it became increasingly difficult to begin or finish anything, focus, and deal with daily life.

I turned to a therapist and I'm on a daily medicine regime, and I feel almost 100% better! It's great! Really :D But, that's not what this post is about. Ha! I'll be posting a separate entry on my visit to the California Market this morning. I had such a blast shopping through all sorts of different Designer show rooms. Sample sales, baby! That's where it's at.

Anywho. I thought I'd write a post on sharing a space with your spouse. I've been getting a ton of friends coming to me for advice lately. You see, I'm not trying to brag, but I do have the most fabulous, loving, and deeply connected relationship with my Fiancé.

A major issue in some households, is when one partner moves in with the other. For example, I moved in with Matthew, so all that space that used to be mine alone, I now had to share. When I first visited Matthew's place, I caught the giggles, because it was what's the word? Manly? Let's go with Manly. The walls in the living room were covered with his favorite authors (which we kept up, because they are also my favorite authors), Red Sox memorabilia, ugly green curtains, and... I don't want to even go into the bedroom. I honestly didn't have an issue with any of it, because it was his place and at that point I had ZERO intention of moving in.

Though, the time came when we sat down and had the "talk". The next day, my car was packed with all my belongings I could fit. Unfortunately, all my paintings, twinkling lights, my moroccan lanterns, and my gorgeous vintage white furniture all had to stay behind. I only took my clothing, books, and shoes. Sad, huh?

As the year progressed, I settled into my sweet and comfortable life with the man of my dreams. Everything was wonderful, we walked to breakfast on the weekends and spent all morning in bed chit-chatting about this or that. BUT! Soon, the walls began closing in on me. The Red Sox Victory News articles stared back at me with their proud and manly gaze. I had to have some space to call my own. I needed some lovelies scattered about the house.

When you plan on "girling" up the place, make sure to sit down with your partner and discuss what you would like to do and then come to a compromise. I didn't want to change Matthew's life... I didn't want him to take down all the things he loved. Instead, we came up with a plan, moved some things around, and did a bit of shopping. We bought a new comforter and sheet set that was neither extremely manly or girly, changed the curtains, and all my little antique finds that went with the "library" feel of the living room soon took shape. Now we have a lovely, beautiful, and comfortable home that we both can agree on.

It's important to have a little space for yourself, but also to have a shared space that truly represent you both. An easy way to do this, is to bring in family photos. Arrange them together. Take a concept your partner already had going on and get creative with it, to form something you can also be happy with.

It's important to create a home environment that has positive energy and love. When your spouse or yourself come home from work, all the drama and frustrations from the day should be left at the door. Light some candles, cuddle up on the couch, and turn on a great film. Home is where the heart is.

Peace, Love, and Pixie Dust

The Princess of Carrillo Drive,

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